Skip to content

Southern Fried Science

Over 15 years of ocean science and conservation online

  • Home
  • About SFS
  • Authors
  • Support SFS

Tag: Smaug

Middle Earth could have been saved by the Endangered Species Act

Posted on December 22, 2014December 21, 2014 By Andrew Thaler 2 Comments on Middle Earth could have been saved by the Endangered Species Act
Popular Culture, Science
Smaug gigan
Smaug gigananteus syn. Cordylus giganteus, the Giant Girdled Lizard, because of course there’s an actual species named Smaug. Photo by Wilfried Berns.

In a cave in the Lonely Mountain there lived a dragon. Not a gnarly, goblin-stuffed, slimy cave, filled with the bowels of orcs and fishy creepers, nor yet an empty, granite, echo-less cave with nothing in it to lie down on or horde: it was a dragon-cave, and that meant gold. At least it did, until a nasty band of poachers found Lonesome Smaug, the last of his species, alone, asleep, threatening none, and smote his genus from the red ledger, stripping Middle Earth of critical biodiversity.

The ecologists of Carsondell would say, of the age of war that followed, that the men and dwarves and elves and hobbits brought the darkness upon themselves. Indeed, as the Dark Lord raised his army, denuded the forests, and belched carbon from the factories of Mordor, Gandalf the Grey, one of the more powerful, though among the least conservation-minded, of the wizards would remark: “It has been said that dragon-fire could melt and consume the Rings of Power, but there is not now any dragon left on earth in which the old fire is hot enough.”

The Grey Wizard failed to mention that, were it not for his callousness, there would be*.

Read More “Middle Earth could have been saved by the Endangered Species Act” »

Recent Popular Posts

Shark of Darkness: Wrath of Submarine is a fake documentaryShark of Darkness: Wrath of Submarine is a fake documentaryAugust 10, 2014Michelle Jewell
Deep-sea Mining: It’s science fiction, until it isn’t.Deep-sea Mining: It’s science fiction, until it isn’t.May 14, 2025Andrew Thaler
My "Follow ocean science and conservation experts on Bluesky and Instagram" assignmentMy "Follow ocean science and conservation experts on Bluesky and Instagram" assignmentNovember 19, 2024David Shiffman
Here's what I teach my students about finding jobs in marine biology and conservationHere's what I teach my students about finding jobs in marine biology and conservationApril 10, 2024David Shiffman
Our favorite sea monsters – Ningen (#4)Our favorite sea monsters – Ningen (#4)September 7, 2010Andrew Thaler
What can the funniest shark memes on the internetz teach us about ocean science and conservation?What can the funniest shark memes on the internetz teach us about ocean science and conservation?November 8, 2013David Shiffman
Alberta, Canada is the proud owner of the largest man-made pyramid on the planetAlberta, Canada is the proud owner of the largest man-made pyramid on the planetOctober 16, 2012Andrew Thaler
We Were Wrong About Megalodon: lessons learned from 10 years combating fake science in popular mediaWe Were Wrong About Megalodon: lessons learned from 10 years combating fake science in popular mediaMarch 4, 2024Andrew Thaler
The Metals Company has a Jones Act ProblemThe Metals Company has a Jones Act ProblemApril 2, 2025Andrew Thaler
What is a Sand Shark?What is a Sand Shark?November 12, 2017Chuck Bangley
Subscribe to our RSS Feed for updates whenever new articles are published.

We recommend Feedly for RSS management. It's like Google Reader, except it still exists.

Southern Fried Science

  • Home
  • About SFS
  • Authors
  • Support SFS


If you enjoy Southern Fried Science, consider contributing to our Patreon campaign.

Copyright © 2025 Southern Fried Science.

Theme: Oceanly Premium by ScriptsTown